Each issue we run our Caption Competition for readers in our popular Weird section. The winners receive a one-year subscription (6 issues).


Then enter your email address, name and phone number and click submit.

You can also mail your caption to:

Caption Comp
PO Box 96
Ascot Vale VIC 3032



Budget indeed…

• Hey Carlos, do you reckon they seen me crossing the border?

• I’ll never bring imported beer to a party again, I promise.

• Hehe! Payback is hell! I’ve been waiting for a chance to get him back! This will teach his drunk ass to shave my head when I’m passed out!

• Told you the brakes were good in this van!

• My wife was coming to but she had nowhere to tie her hand bag.

• You got to take it when you can get it ZZZ…

• Safety first. Shit, I forgot my helmet!

• You reckon this is bad? You should see my wife drive!

• Courtesy bus for bike riders.

• In the dog house.

• No fuss biker.

• I’ve gotta get a proper bike, this is embarrassing!

• Is he still there? Yes, I can see him in the mirror. He’s never been the same since his wife left him and rode off on the Harley.

• I’ll do whatever it takes to get there on my bike.

• I’m so bloody tired, tied & tyred.

• Bob’s extremely rare barn find – the red recliner!

• Postman Pat was such an idiot doing a straight swap for my Harley.

• If this is Honda’s idea of a courtesy bike, they can jam it. Time to talk to the Harley-Davidson crowd.

• Hard times at Aus Post if this is their recovery vehicle.

• Loving the new taxi service in Sydney!

• We need to stop at the servo and squeegee that shit off the rear window.

• He just wouldn’t stop farting!

• Damn, these bloody toll road cameras are getting hard to avoid.

• When you get a decent bike we might let you in the van.

• Road testing the new PSI Comfort Seat… due 2016.

• New for 2016 Harleys Ride’n’Tied model spy shot.

• Spy shot reveals Harley’s new “Outbacker” multi-purpose, hang anywhere lightweight off-roader new for 2016.

• Ah, the life of an outback traveller. Comfort all the way.

• The chauffeured spare is looking a bit tired.

• Spare tyre? Tick. Spare bike? Tick. Spare rider? Tick!



• Budget bike tours.

Congratulations to Scott Craw. A one-year sub to HEAVY DUTY is heading your way!

Our cowgirl farmed in some hearty caption comps entries. Here’s a selection…
• So that’s what they mean by being on the bare bones of your arse!
• An udder case of mad cow disease …
• Handles like a cow, make no bones about it ...
• Dried up crusty old bikie riding a weird pushy
• I asked for a Harley Crossbones, but this is a joke lol!
• I just wanna jump your bones!
• Holy cow it’s friesian on this bike
• When they removed the bullsh*t from my Honda, this is all that’s left.
• I always wanted a bare bones Harley!
• Bad to the bone? That is udderly ridiculous!
• I’ve heard of flogging a dead horse, but this is ridiculous!
• Steer me left, steer me right, I’m on my Harley look-a-like!
• I told him, “it’s udderly ridiculous and that’s no bull. I can ride anything.”
• Udder chaos!
• Has a real boner for riding.
• Suspension on this thing is crap, rattles me to the bones.
• How’s this for a custom Cowasaki! 
• There’s nothing sexy about skin and bone. You gotta have some junk in the trunk.
• Beauty may be skin deep, but ugly goes clear to the bone.
• Should have slowed down when I saw a sign saying “Caution: cattle next 5km!”
• Nana Mouskouri goes Nomad ...
• That’s not quite what I meant by a “Bare Bones Chopper”
• That’s not a burnout behind me ... it’s bullsh*t
• Udderly ridiculous
• She always said she loved riding a good ol’ boner.
• She’s pretty and has lots of bones! And looks a bit horny!
• Nothing to see here, just a couple of old cows.
• Oh they have so butchered that bike!
Congratulations to David Clarke. A one-year subscription to HEAVY DUTY is heading your way!Here’s what you thought about these wanna be bikers …
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